Tuesday, December 1, 2015

I Need My Own Space, Again...

I need my own space again, and it’s no one’s fault but my own. After graduating from college, I said goodbye to the ups and downs of living with roommates and was more than eager to have my own place. In doing so I got accustom to doing my own thing. From blasting music at 2am and having guests and gatherings, to choosing not to have any company and enjoying the peace and quiet; whatever happened in my apt IT WAS MY CHOICE. I miss that.

Last year when the lease was up on my Brooklyn apartment, I decided I wanted to live in the city. Well unless you’re ballin’ (which I am not), affording to live in Manhattan on your own usually doesn’t happen. So I had to compromise my alone time to live in the neighborhood of my choice.
At first living with roommates wasn’t bad at all. Everyone in my apartment has their own stuff going on, so we randomly see each other in passing. And I am completely fine with that. Everyone does their part to somewhat keep the apartment clean, and there really isn’t much one could complain about.

But for some reason, in recent months some things have changed. I’m that person who likes things a certain way and wants to navigate around the apartment when and how I feel like. So having to wait 20 minutes to use the bathroom because someone is in there is the WORST! Being woken up at random hours because someone is walking down the hall too hard/loud is terrible. (I could go on with more examples, but I’ll chill.)

No disrespect to my roommates, their just living their lives and their nice people. And no I haven’t said anything to them about this because when I’m annoyed about something, I don’t tend to address it in a nice way because I’m pissed.

I also haven’t addressed it because I could have a completely different set of roommates and would still have the same issue. My mom’s says I need to adjust and get used to it because when I have a husband I’ll most likely have the same issues. But I disagree. With my husband I will most definitely bang on the bathroom door, ask him to keep the noise down, and address whatever other issues I have (and I would hope for him to do the same with me).

In my mind, having a husband and having roommates are two different things. I live with roommates because I have to. I will live with my husband because I want to. And when you want to do something you work with the person or people involved to make sure everyone is good. Being in a situation because you have to brings about a different way of thinking and living.

“It gets harder, before it gets better.” I’m choosing to apply that saying to my current situation. And I’m praying that when my lease is up next year, somehow some way God opens up an unexpected door that will allow me to be in a more comfortable situation. Or, I just need to pack up and move back to Cali where I can afford to have my own space…


  1. Have you looked into moving uptown? I'm in New York City but I live all the way in Westchester county in a room mate situation. Just two of us so things are different but things can be annoying at times. Try moving upper Manhattan ... It's a little more affordable.

    1. Hey Amanda! I actually do live uptown. The apts in my price range are sub-par and not worth the amount.

  2. Sometimes livInc with a husband is like a roommate...cause even when you tell them the stuff that annoys you they think you're over reacting!